Undiagnosed ADHD in Adults
Individuals who don't receive an ADHD diagnosis as children may struggle with many life issues as adults, including problems with relationships, work and finances. This can result in feelings of shame, frustration and anxiety.
If an adult is diagnosed with undiagnosed ADHD they may feel relieved that they have a reason behind the challenges they have faced all their lives. They may also experience secondary effects, like:
Relationships
Being married or getting settled with a long-term partner usually means having someone to share the challenges and joys of everyday life. Having someone to help run the household, take care of children and offer emotional support. This may not be true for couples where both or one partner have undiagnosed ADHD. Non-ADHD partners can feel overwhelmed, resentful and feel as if they're being manipulated or nagged from their partner with ADHD. The spouses of those with ADHD can feel emasculated, shamed and unwanted because they are constantly corrected and reminded how they act in public.
Forgetfulness and impulsivity in adults with ADHD are often misinterpreted by their loved ones as a lack of care. This can result in disputes and hurt feelings. Couples may also experience lack of communication, with important issues being ignored or not discussed at all.
If not treated, the symptoms of adult ADHD can impact relationships and work, but more importantly they can result in health issues such as substance abuse, depression anxiety, low self-esteem and depression. Roy believes that the government should spend more money on training psychiatrists and helping people with undiagnosed ADHD receive the treatment they require. If left untreated those with ADHD are at greater chance of harming others and themselves.
The best way to stay clear of these negative effects is to recognize ADHD in both you and your partner, so that you can be able to manage them. Couples who are open, honest and committed are able to overcome the difficulties that arise in their relationship, even though they both have ADHD.
If you're experiencing issues in your relationship, discuss it about it calmly in private. Choose a time that there aren't many distractions and ensure that you keep eye contact throughout your conversation. If you or your partner begin to lose focus and begin to lose focus, try rephrasing what they are saying or ask them to repeat themselves so that they can hear you clearly. It is best to deal with these issues as soon as they occur, before resentment and anger develop. This gives your partner the chance to apologize, if not already.
Time Management
The biggest challenge for people who suffer from ADHD is managing their time. They might not know how long something takes and can be easily distracted. adhd diagnosis uk adults can lead people to put off tasks or miss deadlines. They might also have difficulty with buying impulsively and find it hard to keep a budget in check. People who suffer from ADHD may also have difficulty staying focused and retaining important information.
Undiagnosed ADHD in adults can lead to issues with relationships and finances. Psychiatrists who do not have the right training might not be able recognize the symptoms of ADHD and a lot of people don't receive a diagnosis until they reach the age of adulthood. Barbara Keeley believes that the government should be investing more in psychiatrists as well as the training of doctors.
People who have not been diagnosed with ADHD also have trouble managing their emotions. They are unable to comprehend their own feelings and those of others. This can cause issues in relationships. People with undiagnosed ADHD can experience mood swings and can quickly alter their views about a subject or person.
According to Dr Ashok Roy, head of the Royal College of Psychiatrists' intellectual disability faculty, women suffering from undiagnosed ADHD tend to suffer from inattention problems coupled with emotional and daydreaming issues, whereas men tend to suffer from more hyperactivity and behavioural issues. Dr. Roy says that a valid diagnosis should include a long interview that examines the social and emotional history of the patient, as well as an interview with a relative who can offer a perspective on childhood behavior.
People with undiagnosed ADHD need to seek a diagnosis and then try different strategies to improve their time management skills and organizational abilities. Some of these strategies include using a planner or color-coding as also notes, reminders and daily routines. You can also make use of a free app like RescueTime that tracks the usage of websites and apps to help them determine what is distracting them and at what times of day they are most productive.
Memory

If you've lived with undiagnosed ADHD for their entire lives, memory may be a major problem. People suffering from ADHD have trouble with short-term memory, and may have a harder time remembering things they've learned. They also have problems with working memory. This is the small amount of information they keep in their mind when solving problems, following instructions or dealing with emotional issues and stress.
As an adult the responsibilities that come with family and work demands more from a person than they did in childhood. This increased workload, combined with the symptoms of ADD and ADHD, can put a lot of pressure on the ability to keep up. This can lead to procrastination or disorganization. Things are left unfinished or completed in the last minute. Over time, this can lead to a cycle of self-doubt and frustration and could lead to more untreated ADHD symptoms.
It's possible that a child who has ADHD may not be diagnosed because they hide their symptoms through inadequate study habits, lack of organization skills or excessive fidgeting. This is particularly true at work, where someone with ADHD may be perceived as lazy or unreliable because of their lack focus.
Undiagnosed ADHD symptoms can be difficult to identify in adults, as they're usually less obvious than in children. Hyperactivity is more obvious in children than adults who are often stressed and overwhelmed by their daily tasks. Adults who suffer from ADHD should be aware of the subtle symptoms, like daydreaming, difficulties following directions, forgetting important dates, and juggling too many tasks at a time.
One study revealed that the deficits in working memory seen in ADHD adults were due to biological factors related to the frontal lobe the brain, which controls impulse control and attention. People who scored better on an 0-back, 1-back, n-back memory test showed less activity than those who did less well. This is consistent with previous studies that have revealed a link between ADHD and a decrease in working memory performance.
Fidgeting
For many people, fumbling is a natural response to feeling anxious or nervous. Fidgeting can also be used to ease boredom, generate extra energy and improve concentration. For those who are not able to control their fidgeting, it can become a problem. The good thing is that you can learn to manage the symptoms and take control of your life.
You might have a hard to sit still or pay attention during classes or meetings. This can be very frustrating both for you and others particularly if you are constantly interrupted or disappear into your thoughts. Fidgeting can be mistaken for inattention or ignoring others. You may be missing important information. This could also impact your performance at work and in your career as well as your personal relationships.
People who fidget may develop what's known as Body-Focused Repetitive Behaviors or BFRBs which are destructive and harmful habits like hair pulling, onychophagia (nail biting), and dermatillomania (skin picking). These behaviors are similar but cause physical harm. These actions can be self-destructive and can even be life-threatening in certain situations.
The good news is that you can learn to overcome the fidgeting issues associated with undiagnosed ADHD and BFRBs. There are ways to redirect your movement to be more productive, such as chewing gum or using a fidget spinner. You can also limit the amount of time you fidget and find an accountability partner to keep track with if you exceed your limit. Additionally, you can try to stop your fidgeting and engage in other activities that engage your senses and allow you to stay focused on the task at present.
If you're not sure if your ADHD symptoms are impacting your life, it's a good idea to consult an experienced psychotherapist. You can do this from the comfort of your own home by filling out a quick questionnaire and then being matched with an experienced therapist who is licensed in as little as 48 hours! Click the button to learn more.